a young pakistani doctor blogs...
Thursday, July 14, 2005
  About praying.
I woke up in the middle of the night after only 3 hours of sleep. I still have the stomach acidity problem and am sipping some antacids to try to quieten things down there. I don’t feel very sleepy, and I didn’t think I’d easily be able to get back to sleep, so here I am. I might have to get some H2 blockers for this acidity….

There is whole dimension to human existence in spirituality which sometimes escapes me. I am a Muslim, although not a very good one. These means that while I believe firmly in my faith, and understand fully what it is I believe in (as opposed to illogical blind faith), I am not regular in my five daily prayers.

As all humans, I tend to turn to the creator with great purity of heart and ‘sincerity’ when I find myself troubled and I’m doing so these days. I am bothered by the fact that with me, this is a recurring theme. Whenever things get bad, I turn to prayer, and when the weight is lifted from my shoulders, I gradually become careless with regards to my prayers and lose my ‘spirituality’.
Putting that issue aside for now - I feel a lot closer to God now than I was last week. The difference is quite dramatic. I feel more energetic, more ambitious, and more confident that God will help me to iron out my many difficulties. The whole USMLE in 10 months scheme seems achievable when I remember that during that time, I’ll have my prayers to turn to to boost my spirits when they’re flagging.

I’m writing about this because the about-turn in my outlook on life has been quite dramatic since I started praying earnestly again. I feel like a teenager again, eager and gearing to go and tackle a difficult task ahead. Bring it on, the vibe seems to be saying. I haven’t felt this way for years, and when I think that the next 12 months will bring with it very difficult, long hard hours of studying, I think of it more as an adventure than a mind-crushing, frightening experience. After all, if my dreams are realized, I could be starting a residency in the states in two years time. That seems like a really short time.

Uhh…bring it on??
Comments: Post a Comment

<< Home
Recent med school graduate from Peshawar, Pakistan. Started blogging when in throes of final year exams. Currently studying for USMLE Step 1. Aiming for the 2008 Match. I blog about my studies, my worries, and my thoughts on life. I live in Islamabad.

Aya's Randomness
I, Zak
Crow's Nest
Kevin MD
Sometime's Sobia

Watan Dost
Fingers and tubes
      June 2005
      July 2005

      October 2005

      November 2005

      December 2005

      January 2006

      February 2006

      March 2006

      April 2006

      May 2006

      June 2006

      Email Me


Powered by Blogger